Little old man

At the feeding last night little man didn't do too well so we tried to top him off with a bottle. He was pretty out of it. I'm not sure if it's the way his clothes are pulled up high or how his legs are crunched up but I think he looks like a cute old man. He's just chillin' with his bottle trying to tell us he's just too tired.

I feel like everyday this is getting harder and harder. I'll admit that I am getting frustrated that he is not home. I just feel really bad that I don't get to hold him all the time and that he has to just lay in this little bed in the hospital. I just really really really want him to come home. I seriously don't even feel like a mom. It is just so hard when I'm just going to the hospital to visit him and have to leave without him. I'm pretty sure it is all starting to wear on me. Hopefully it will not be that much longer because I'm not sure I can handle it. I mean I love the time I get to spend with him I just feel like I am missing out on so much. We are very lucky that his only problem is eating and hopefully he will catch on soon. He is two weeks old today which means his gestational age is 37 weeks. I am very hopeful that in the next few days he will be able to recognize when he is hungry and be able to wake up to eat and eat a greater volume. I'm also having a hard time because I feel like my milk supply is dropping. It's like I'm not around him all the time so my body doesn't think I need that much. I feel like all I do anymore is pump and that is getting a bit old. I do have quite the stock up in the freezer but hopefully it keeps on coming. I suppose this is somewhat of a negative post and I really do not want to be negative. I'm just trying to get my frustrations out.